Getting Started with Summer Water Toys
Me and my buddy Paul saw this blistering hot weekend forecast last Tuesday. Straight oven weather, no clouds. Paul texted me saying “My pool’s gonna be a bathtub without proper toys. Find something fun.” Felt like he threw me straight into mission mode.
First thing? Drove down to that huge sports store outside town Friday morning. Place was packed with shiny junk. Grabbed whatever looked big and colorful: giant floating hoops, some weird bouncy target thing, a couple jumbo water shooter guns, and these thick foam noodles that looked like overgrown spaghetti. Cashier gave me that “good luck carrying this” look.
Testing Day at Paul’s Backyard
Saturday hits 90 degrees before noon. Paul’s filling the pool while I rip open all the boxes like a kid at Christmas. Tossed in the huge floating ring target first. Stupid thing sank half under water like a sad soggy donut.
- Water Basketball Hoop: Screwed it onto the pool edge. First shot? Plastic rim exploded off the backboard when Paul dunked too hard. Sounded like a gunshot.
- Splash Bombs (those squirty guns): Pulled the trigger on mine. Tiny little dribble came out. Paul’s wife Jen yelled from the patio “Did you even test them in the sink first?” Oops.
- Float Noodles: Held up great! Until Paul tried jousting with them. Cracked me square in the ribs. Felt like getting smacked with a foam baseball bat.
Figuring Out What Actually Works
After pizza break (cheese floated in the pool sun), we dumped the broken hoop in the trash. Pulled out that bouncy circular target disc. You’re supposed to bounce balls off it. Turns out it floated perfectly flat. Dunking? Easy. Trying to flip it? Impossible – weighted weird. We ended up just using it as a floating drink holder.
Worst part? Fishing out the stupid ring when it sank. Had to dive down like 4 feet to grab it. Felt like salvaging treasure from the Titanic while Paul yelled “Stop splashing!”
By sundown, only 3 things survived:
- Float noodles (used as pool markers)
- The target disc (dumb but reliable)
- Regular beach ball (Jen brought it from her garage)
Lesson Learned
Fancy toys? Mostly junk. Felt like wasting $70 on colorful plastic crap. That big floating target ring I bought? Took it back Sunday morning. Cashier didn’t even blink. Think he gets returns every Monday from people like me. Next time? Sticking with dollar store balls and inflatable rafts. Or just float on my back with a cold beer. Way less hassle.